A treatise on style... or how to refer to your characters without actually saying their names

This post is... exactly what it says in the title. It will (hopefully) show you how to refer to your characters without using their names. It can be very exhausting to read someone's fiction and see the same one, two, or three names printed several times in every paragraph. Now, you need to use names sometimes, especially when you are writing about a large group of people conversing. It is necessary to clarify who is speaking. But in scenes with two or three participants, you have the flexibility to use other adjectives and titles for your characters.

If you have Microsoft Word, try an experiment. Highlight all of your novel/whatever you're working on and go to the 'Tools' tab. Then go to 'Autosummarize'. It should open up a new window and allow you to shorten your highlighted work. The automatic choices range from 75% to 25%, or you can choose the exact number of words you want to shorten to. Pick the lowest one (it should be ten sentences).


For your pleasure and amusement, I will now read the entirety of my masterpiece, Chopin at 3:00 in the Morning (the condensed version).


Chopin at 3:00 in the Morning (in 11 words and/or 10 sentences)

“Gwen! “Mandy.”

“Gwen – Gwen…? “Gwen!” “Mandy!” Mandy...” “Gwen... “Gwen.” “Gwen?” “Gwen!



*Bows to the thunderous applause*


See? It's just the two main characters' names over and over again. You get the idea. This proves just how much the names of your characters saturate your work.

Now, names are still going to be your primary means of identifying which character is speaking or performing a specific action. However, some variation is occasionally refreshing.



Here's an example from Magnetic Resistance, simply because it is in third person, the most difficult viewpoint to write in terms of understanding who is talking (first person presents other, unique challenges).

It would be so easy to fall in love with Alex. Who am I kidding? I'm already in love with her. I have been for years. Olivia sighed, pressing a kiss to the dozing attorney's warm forehead. Her eyes were closed, her breath deep and even as she slept curled up against Olivia's side like it was the most natural place in the world for them to be. Everything felt so right...

Olivia shifted slightly in Alex's embrace, almost smiling as the blonde murmured something in her sleep and held her tighter, unwilling to let her go. The small movement made Olivia's heart ache. Was Alex afraid she would cut and run? She could not deny that she was thinking about it. Part of her wanted to sneak out the door and never come back. After experiencing Alex, no one else would ever be enough. Alex loved her. Olivia believed it. She had seen it in those sincere blue eyes, felt it in the gentle, reverent caresses that explored her legs and hips and breasts, the lips that had teased and taken and tortured hers.

She had believed it as Alex's fierce, scorching tongue explored her folds, only pausing when the counselor glanced up through the square lenses of those damn glasses and licked her lips, lips covered in gloss and a smile and Olivia. At the time, the look had been incendiary, even decadent. But remembering, the detective knew that there was love behind it. And that terrified her.

Notice how I (subtly) replaced the name Alex with 'the dozing attorney', 'the counselor' and 'the blonde'. I replaced Olivia with 'the detective' at the end.

You can use someone's hair color, eye color, skin color, clothing, height, job, or profession to distinguish who you are talking about. Basically, use whatever you want. Just please do it in moderation. Seeing 'the blonde' a million times is no better than seeing your character's name over and over again on the page.


Here are some examples, but please, for the LOVE OF ALL THINGS HOLY, use them sparingly, and juggle them so you don't end up sounding like a bad Harlequin. PLEASE.

'The taller woman'
'The olive-skinned woman'
'The scientist'
'The police officer'
'The spaceship pilot'
'The politician'
'The younger woman'
'The brunette'
'The violinist'

You get the idea... profession, age, hair color, height, ect. Just be very, very careful. This tool can be useful for adding color and mixing things up, but please use with caution.

You can also use 'her lover' or 'her girlfriend'/'her wife'/ect, esp during sex scenes, but once again, be careful. Don't overuse or you'll end up with a disaster.

New Website

I have certainly been a busy bee recently! I have a new website that catalogues all of my work. Nothing new, just all the old stuff posted in a clear, easy-to-read place with links and such. Yay me.


http://raedmagdon.wordpress.com/

To-Do List

Just in case you were interested, here is my writing To Do List. I'm mostly posting it here for my benefit, but perhaps some of you will find it interesting. In no fixed order (although priorities are generally near the top)...


Fanfiction:
- Last chapter of 'Magnetic Resistance' (Law and Order: SVU)
- Finish 'It Happened One Night' (Law and Order: SVU)
- Finish 'Exhibitionist' (Law and Order: SVU)
- Start sequel to 'Magnetic Resistance' (Law and Order: SVU)

///// Half-started ideas /////
- Twilight: The Descent Into Madness (Legally Blonde/L&O:SVU/Twilight crossover)
- By Courier (Devil Wears Prada/L&O: SVU crossover)
- Unnamed Devil Wears Prada fic
- Unnamed Jane Rizzoli/Maura Isles smut (Rizzoli & Isles)
- Unnamed KIGO fic (Kim Possible/Shego... yes, I am a total dork)


Original Fiction:
- The Witch's Daughter (2 more chapters to go...)
- Senator's Daughter (needs a title!)

///// Half-Started Ideas/////
- Lilith's Redemption (new supernatural-themed original fiction novel)
- Murder, Lies, Statutory Rape, and Madison Rose (drama/romance)

///// Other Plans /////
- The two other books in the Chopin universe
- The last book in the Amendyr universe


That list probably makes very little sense to you, but it's good to have goals. Lots of goals. And NaNoWriMo is coming up, so that will be a splendid time to knock out some writing and hit some big word count numbers.

Taking Critiques Well

I have covered this particular topic before, but the emphasis of my last post on critiques leaned more towards how to give a good critique than how to accept one graciously. Anyone that indulges in the creative process must occasionally accept critiques of their work. For some people, this is easy to do. They are eager to learn, excited about new ideas, and constantly looking to improve.

I am not one of those people.

Compared to the average Joe out there, I am excellent at taking constructive criticism. (From here on out, we are going to assume that all criticism given is constructive, given by a colleague or a mentor/teacher figure). Compared to some other artists and musicians and writers out there, I'm a little sensitive.

Today, my flute teacher suggested that I try playing a piece I am working on ('Kokopelli', in case anyone is curious) in a completely different way than I had been practicing it. Of course, her way was better. Instead of getting excited about her suggestions, which were given in a mature, informative, and easy-to-understand way, I was angry that I had not thought of them first and sulked until she pointed out that I should be excited about the learning process instead of dwelling on things I could have done better. It is kind of like seeing someone else write the Next Great Novel and thinking, "why can't I do that?" instead of reading it, enjoying it, and weaving threads of that author's style into your own work to strengthen your prose.

Teachers show us the way. That is why we rely on them. As writers, we often must teach ourselves. Although we can study examples (a little like learning from a recording for musicians), we do not go into a music studio or attend art classes. You can take a group creative writing class, but it's not quite the same as having a private lesson once a week. Instead, we must rely on the critique in order to engage in the student-teacher relationship.

In general, there are two kinds of people you will get a critique from: colleagues and teachers/mentors. I mentioned this a few paragraphs ago. In the music world, a colleague is someone in the same musical group as you. For example, the oboist I sit next to when I play piccolo in Wind Ensemble or the other girls in my flute studio. Discussing technique with a colleague is very useful for writers. It can be anything from reading two line reviews on fanfiction.net to showing your entire novel to another writer to see what they think.

A teacher/mentor figure in the writing world would either be a vastly more experienced writer with more published/completed works than you whose style you admire, or a professional editor in the publishing industry. Basically, you want to look at the next level up. I could even be a teacher or mentor figure for a beginning writer.

When you are accepting a critique from a colleague, it does not sting as much because the playing field is even. You can take anything they say with a grain of salt if you fiercely disagree. Ex: "I don't care if she says this character is too unbelievable, I'm going to keep Clyde the Purple Mastodon in my novel anyway!" Although you always have the last say because, ultimately, your work is your own, I often find that my teacher's suggestions immediately improve whatever I happen to be working on. My frustration comes from not correcting myself before receiving the advice.

Instead of thinking:
- Why didn't I think of that? I should have done that in the first place...
- I'll never get anywhere if I keep making such big mistakes
- I had no idea this was even a problem! What if I'm never able to pick out my own mistakes and be my own teacher someday?

Try thinking:
- Oh, that's a good point, this advice will improve my novel.
- Yay! I learned something new today.


This sounds like really basic advice, but keeping a positive attitude can be emotionally draining and very difficult. It is a test of endurance, particularly for negative, cynical people like myself. That is why it is so important to critique others in a positive way. Nothing you say could ever be half as bad as the things people sometimes say to themselves. And if you wouldn't say something mean to another person for fear of being rude, why on earth should you tolerate that kind of negative mental speech from yourself?

The Triumphant Return

Guess whose back with a brand new track (er, blog post)?

... Well, no one, if my Music History teacher and other professors had anything to say about it. They have been piling on the homework, and I have been practicing like the devil. I have been writing, since I figured you guys would rather have me spouting out more smut and fluff and action scenes than keeping up-to-date on my blog, but I've decided to give a quick update and then get to work on posting some writing tips and tricks.

Aside from my fanfiction obsession (Magnetic Resistance is almost done!), my new project, which I have temporarily dubbed 'The Senator's Daughter', is coming along nicely at about 15,000 words. I have 6,000 more words to go of The Witch's Daughter, but I'm seriously drained for that novel, and I'm trying my best to make the last 6,000 words as high-quality as the first 70,000 or so. I don't want to disappoint and rush to finish just so that novel is off my plate. The ending is the most important part of any work.

Yes, there have been arguments made for the beginnings of novels being the most important. If you don't have a good beginning, why would you bother reading to the end in the first place? But I still say that the ending of a novel is far more important, because that is the last, powerful punch that finishes off your grand adventure and (hopefully) leaves the reader with questions, an emotional reaction, or something. Stories with a great beginning and a bad ending leave the reader feeling cheated and disappointment, while stories with a so-so beginning and a slamming ending leave the reader feeling pleasantly surprised.

Of course, if you can have a good beginning and an equally good ending, that is even better. A double-attack from both sides, if you will. And if you can get a good middle thread connecting the two, then you're in the money. Or, well, you'll make people feel very, very happy while cutting out coupons from newspapers, unless you are supported by your parents/spouse (*coughcough*) or your name is Stephen King or JK Rowling.

In order to write a good ending, I tend to follow the Storyteller's Cardinal Rule: Always Have A Happy Ending (Unless A Sad, Poignant Ending Is Appropriate). This seems like common sense, but you would be surprised how many people kill off their characters or ruin everything at the end of a novel for no good reason. Unless you can lay out a sound argument for doing so, let them ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after. Your audience will appreciate it and they might decide not to come after you with torches and pitchforks.

Another tip - once the climax has happened (the climax of the action, not the sexual climaxes, of which there are many in my novels), wrap it up quickly. You need to get out of there pretty fast in order to keep the reader's interest. It's nice to add questions at the end that can continue to germinate in the audience's minds, but don't leave too many untied threads or you will leave the reader feeling unsatisfied. It is a balancing act, like many other writing tools.

Anyway, I have to close my laptop because my professor just walked in. I'll update later. Music Girl, Away!